Mommy-hood Conclusions

I turned into a mom a little over four years ago.  Before my initiation, I would have never given any of these things a second thought but alas, mommy-hood has enlightened me and so I thought I’d share my findings.

  1. It doesn’t matter if your child has the dexterity to play with a toy above his age level or that he won’t swallow the pieces.  Age range is listed on toys for the sole purpose of benefiting  parental sanity.  Sure my son could handle the tiny pieces of a robot that he was able to put together on his own but when that robot wouldn’t defy the laws of physics and stand on end, there was hell to pay and I was up.
  2. Potty training is one big sick joke and the officials who determined that our kids need to be diaper free to attend school are all laughing at us.  One does not simply tell a toddler what to do and what not to do with their digestive system. The harder you push your child into potty training, the harder they push back.  If you need me, I’ll be over in the corner, changing another diaper.
  3. No magic cream or concealer will get rid of the dark circles and bags under my eyes.  I wear them like a badge of honor now and high five other moms in my head (obviously it would be ridiculous if I really did it).  I’m right there with you sister!
  4. I will never be on time again.  Even if a miracle happens and I’m able to get every water, snack, diaper, stroller, coat and toy in the car, someone decides this is the time to learn putting on their shoes themselves and kicks and screams refuses any assistance. I’m sure I’ll get there before the event ends.
  5. It will be a long time until I can have any real conversation with my husband in our house again.  Lost are the days we spent gazing into each other’s eyes over dinner.  Now, every day is so chaotic and filled with unrecognizable noises at decibels that I didn’t know humans could reach that the sole purpose of looking into each other’s eyes is to decipher the Morse Code we’re blinking back and forth.

What realizations have you come to terms with?

 

Best of Worst
A Bit Of Everything

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11 Comments

  1. Ooh lots of things….currently never to be able to wear a dress (breastfeeding) not really practical, never to be able to take a shower alone. Thanks for sharing this list, it made me chuckle this morning. Claire x #abitofeverything

    1. Oh yes! Showering and going to the bathroom alone sound like a distant luxury right now haha! Even the dog has to be in the room!

  2. LOL…Yes, the leaving the house on time, that’s a toughie. I have always been a punctual person and I remember breaking into a panic after I had #1 and if I had to go anywhere with him. I had to start preparing to leave the house two hours before I actually had to leave. But still the moment we leave and strap in the car seat, he’ll do a number two for sure and back into the house, we’ll go. I would add that no matter how fancy the toy is, all baby will want to play with is the box and wrapping paper! Thanks for sharing this with #abitofeverything. Made me chuckle!

  3. Oh yes I am nodding along with this. No matter how early you leave something happens. Your time is never your own anymore. Love this post. Thanks for linking up #abitofeverything xx

    1. It’s almost as if the earlier I start at leaving the house, the later I am at actually leaving! Thanks for the comment!

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