I turned into a mom a little over four years ago. Before my initiation, I would have never given any of these things a second thought but alas, mommy-hood has enlightened me and so I thought I’d share my findings.
- It doesn’t matter if your child has the dexterity to play with a toy above his age level or that he won’t swallow the pieces. Age range is listed on toys for the sole purpose of benefiting parental sanity. Sure my son could handle the tiny pieces of a robot that he was able to put together on his own but when that robot wouldn’t defy the laws of physics and stand on end, there was hell to pay and I was up.
- Potty training is one big sick joke and the officials who determined that our kids need to be diaper free to attend school are all laughing at us. One does not simply tell a toddler what to do and what not to do with their digestive system. The harder you push your child into potty training, the harder they push back. If you need me, I’ll be over in the corner, changing another diaper.
- No magic cream or concealer will get rid of the dark circles and bags under my eyes. I wear them like a badge of honor now and high five other moms in my head (obviously it would be ridiculous if I really did it). I’m right there with you sister!
- I will never be on time again. Even if a miracle happens and I’m able to get every water, snack, diaper, stroller, coat and toy in the car, someone decides this is the time to learn putting on their shoes themselves and
kicks and screamsrefuses any assistance. I’m sure I’ll get there before the event ends.
- It will be a long time until I can have any real conversation with my husband in our house again. Lost are the days we spent gazing into each other’s eyes over dinner. Now, every day is so chaotic and filled with unrecognizable noises at decibels that I didn’t know humans could reach that the sole purpose of looking into each other’s eyes is to decipher the Morse Code we’re blinking back and forth.
What realizations have you come to terms with?